Guests of Honor:
JON "BERMUDA" SCHWARTZ
More video you've never seen, more answers to questions you couldn't think of last time you saw him. Bermuda honors us once again with his presence.

"WEIRD AL" Yankovic
He does records and stuff.

Special Guests:

LARRY WEAVER
Larry will headline the show on Friday night at 8:30. Later that night, you can meet him at
Larry Weaver's Ice Cream Social!

COMEDY A LA MODE: Comedian Larry Weaver serves up Big Laughs... with a Cherry on Top!
If Weird Al had a country cousin, it would be North Carolina comedian Larry Weaver. Larry's headed to ALCON III to serve up a heapin' helpin' of comedy goodness -- along with a side of nuts, whip cream and hot fudge! Yep, Friday night registrants are in for a BIG treat. After performing some of his fantastically funny music and stand-up, Larry wants to hang out with the fans, so he's inviting us all to a down-home ice cream social. Grab a spoon and whip up the sundae of your dreams as you enjoy songs from Larry's latest CD, "Looking For Fun." Be sure to get your CDs autographed and strike a pose for Larry with your ice cream creation -- you just might end up as one of the funny pictures on his website! On top of being one of ALCON III's favorite live acts, Larry has opened for Weird Al a bunch of times and is a frequent flyer on Doctor Demento's Funny Five. And as if the funny stuff wasn't enough, Larry is also the world's foremost authority on Trailer Park Ghosts. Got a banshee in your bunk? You'll want to talk to Larry. He does shows at clubs and colleges all over the country, but on Friday night at ALCON III, he's all ours!


THE GREAT LUKE SKI **
Dr. Demento just debuted two of Luke's new tunages on his show, and we're proud to say that ALCON III will be the first place you can buy Luke's new CD, UBER GEEK! Look closely at the cover art...you just might see someone you know.

TONY GOLDMARK **
Our youngest guest performer, will once again drag his mother/producer/roadie to scenic Elk Grove Village for ALCON III! Soon to be a three-time ALCON performer, Tony is best known for such Funny Five favorites as "Kill the Backstreet Boys," "Penguin on the Telly" and "The Sorcerer's Stone." He even honored us at his last appearance by naming his mini-CD "ALCONOCLAST." On Saturday Tony will wake up at noon (not easy for an 18-year old) in just enough time to perform what he promises to be his most elaborate and complex show EVER! We're talkin' props, costumes, rubber chickens, silly hats, Blasted Bill, the whole works! And in case you're undecided about whether or not you should buy his new full-length CD "Masterpiece Weirder" - just remember: Free kazoo with every purchase!

DAN HART **
Dan Hart grew up in the land of Dementia (L.A.), listening to Dr. Demento back when he was just a local DJ there. Dan's childhood dream was realized in 1983, when he had his first song "Leader of the Bland" played on the Doctor's show, Since then he has been a regular contributor, with at least 10 songs receiving airplay and 3 on the Funny Five ("Screaming Beatles," "Sex 'n' Violence," and "Dangerous Toy"). Sex 'n' Violence will be on volume 10 of the Basement Tapes. Dan was once a psychologist (another kind of doctor of dementia), but proved to be too mentally unstable even for that profession. Now he travels around the country, writing and performing silly songs and refusing to grow up.

CARLA ULBRICH **
Award-winning songwriter and Professional Smart Aleck Carla Ulbrich has been compared to the likes of Ray Stevens, Christine Lavin, Jerry Seinfeld, Chet Atkins and Jewel. The guy who said Jewel had been drinking heavily. Carla's live shows and CD, Her Fabulous Debut, have earned her rave reviews and cool songwriting awards: Best Upbeat and Best Overall, 1999 South Florida Folk Fest's Song Competition; first place, 2000 and 1998 Mid-Atlantic Song Contest; second place, 1998 Chris Austin Songwriting Contest; second place: Gamble Rogers Folk Fest's Fingerpicking contest; Dr Demento's Funny Five; grants from the SC Arts Commission and Jim Beam to help fund recordings, and endorsements from Takamine and John Pearse Strings. Carla has taught guitar at several colleges and the National Guitar Workshop. She tours relentlessly all over the country, has appeared on numerous radio stations as well as USA's Up All Night, and has shared the bill with such luminaries as Cheryl Wheeler and Twiggy the Water Skiing Squirrel. Carla Ulbrich is a member of ASCAP and President of the Difficult Last Name Club, likes cheese, and collects bottlecaps.

JEFF MORRIS
As Dr. Demento's semi-official archivist, Jeff is the closest thing you can get to Dr. Demento without actually having Dr. Demento as your DJ. We welcome Jeff back as ALCON's DJ and audio director for the third time.

SUDDEN DEATH
Combine the vocal stylings of Mariah Carey and the musical genius of Beethoven and you produce one of the most beautiful sounds ever heard in the world of music. Sudden Death is nothing like that. Sudden Death combines the "vocal stylings" of Dan Quale with the "musical genius" of a dripping faucet. The end result is a collection of rap songs that only a mother could protect her children from listening to. Sudden Death will be releasing their fifth album, "Fatal Accident Zone" on an unsuspecting public this April. Since the announcement the price of stock for companies that make ear plugs has gone up significantly. The album features "Star Trek Life" and "Road Ragin'" which have been heard on The Dr. Demento Show, duets with Hot Waffles and The Great Luke Ski, as well as the usual rubbish you've come to expect from the band.

THROWING TOASTERS **
Like Luke, the Toasters have a CD ready to sell at ALCON III. Grant had a killer show at ALCON 2000, even if Dirk, Musty and Timmy never showed up. Let's see if the band makes it this time.

BOB RICCI
The Bob Ricci Band opens the Demented Ball, and their show will include three brand new songs making their debut at ALCON III. If you like 'em, two of them will be on the CD they'll have for sale, along with tshirts and photos. And as an extra treat, they've learned some Al songs as well. we'll be performing a few Al covers. Listen for their new release to hit the Dr. Demento show in April, the latest in a string of demented hits like "My Girlfriend's Back," "Ode to Playboy," and "Days of our Lives."

MIKE TOOMEY
comedyhome.com says: With his sharp delivery, quick wit, and identifiable style, Mike Toomey has been a favorite at comedy clubs and special events since 1982. Mike has appeared in concert with such artists as Wayne Newton, Crosby, Stills & Nash, and Reba McIntyre. He has performed on numerous television programs including; HBO's U.S. Comedy Arts Festival in Aspen Colorado; MTV's Half Hour Comedy Hour; and A&E's Comedy on the Road. The Chicago Tribune calls Mike, "One of the funniest and most talented performers to ever work in Chicago." Some of his demented hits include a brilliant Abbott & Costello tribute called "I Took My Mother to a Cockfight," as well as "S.S. Minnow," "Folsom Elementary School," and a favorite of ALCON III's producers, "How The Grinch Stole Chanukah."

** These artists are among those featured on "Laughter is a Powerful Weapon," a 9/11 benefit CD.